I’ve Tried So Hard…..
By Kathryn Taylor

I’ve tried so hard to love you,
But it’s never reached your heart,
Which overflows with jealousy,
That’s tearing mine apart…..
You say that your love for me
Is putting mine to shame….
You say I’m barely trying
And not taking any blame…
I don’t know what to do…
I don’t know what to say…
The rules are always changing
In this game you have us play….
Love is not an obsession…..
It is not consuming another….
It’s not shutting out the world….
Or having to be your mother….
It’s not accusing me unfaithful
Because of crazy fears…
Or thinking your harsh words
Will simply disappear…
You want me to gain weight…..
You want me to dress down….
You wish I weren’t so friendly
And always wore a frown…..
You want no one to look at me,
Or think I’m sweet or fun…
I’m not to have a friend,
Or else you’ll come undone…
You tell me I am stupid….
You spit upon my face…
You break my possessions…
And leave me in disgrace….
Yet, somehow I still love you,
Wishing truth was all a lie,
Wishing you never left me…
Left me asking why?????
And after all this time,
Questions still haunt me,
Why…. is all I ask myself,
The whys of pitiful me……
Why did I fall for you?
Why did I stay and stay?
Why did I live so miserably
And dance in your ballet?
Why did I believe your promises?
Why did I believe your lies?
Why did I forgive continually
As you lived in your disguise?
Why didn’t I just give up?
Why can’t I just give in?
It was all because of love….
Not a game I wanted to win…
But now I have my dignity…
A stand I have to take…
To be who God has made me
Instead of your stupid fake…..
So, here I am to declare to you,
“I chose life over love, you see,
‘Cause you’d rather be a jealous fool
Who had no reason to be…….”

2011 All rights reserved, ã Kathryn Taylor
Copying without permission for non-personal use is forbidden
Loving a man with serious women issues is an awfully hard thing to do........
♫♫........You, with your switching sides
And your wildfire lies and your humiliation....
You.... have pointed out my flaws again,
As if I don't already see them.....
I walk with my head down
Trying to block you out 'cause I'll never impress you...
I just wanna feel okay again.......♫♫
Mean
by Taylor Swift
Empty Handed by Kelly Clarkson
A Little Bit Stronger......by Sara Evans
♫♫  And I'm done hoping that we can work it out,
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around....... Doesn't happen over night, but you turn around and a months gone by,
And you realize you haven't cried.
I'm not giving you a hour or a second or another minute longer.
I'm busy getting stronger.   ♫♫
I've Tried So Hard to Love You.....
By Kathryn Taylor
on YouTube