By Kathryn Taylor
From God’s Word:
Now before the feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that His hour had come that He should depart from this world to the Father, having loved His own who were in the world, He loved them to the end. And supper being ended, the devil having already put it into the heart of Judas Iscariot, Simon's son, to betray Him, Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into His hands, and that He had come from God and was going to God, rose from supper and laid aside His garments, took a towel and girded Himself. After that, He poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples' feet, and to wipe them with the towel with which He was girded…………………………….. Jesus said to him (Peter), "He who is bathed needs only to wash his feet, but is completely clean; and you are clean, but not all of you." For He knew who would betray Him; therefore He said, "You are not all clean." So when He had washed their feet, taken His garments, and sat down again……………..John 13:1-12
Have you ever stopped to think that on the night of the Passover, when Jesus washed the disciple’s feet, He washed each one’s feet in the same loving manner? Jesus knew Judas would betray Him………….Yet He still lovingly washed Judas’ feet. Not half as long………not leaving out the soap…….not using a wire brush…..but just like He did to the others. He was so subtle that night, when telling His disciples about one of them would betray Him, they didn’t have a clue who it was, except Judas himself.
The point I want to make here is not about treating all our kids the same, or trying to keep others from knowing we are struggling terribly with a certain child of ours. I’m not talking about the “special” rules, or consequences, etc. for what is best for this child, I am talking about our hearts. I would like to focus on the loving behavior we can have towards our problem child. I know that I am guilty of making sure that that particular child knew I was upset with them, angry over their rebellion towards me, and all those around me knew it too. I made it clear in my actions and words. I knew that no matter what I did they would fight me………….so why bother? I loved them……….I told them I loved them……..but after years of their defiance and contempt, my heart had become bitter. I knew they could no longer FEEL my love; it was now buried too deep. There are so many things I wish I could go back and do over.
You see, Jesus lovingly washed Judas’ feet. His love towards Judas didn’t keep Judas from betraying Him. It didn’t change him at all. Jesus’ love and behavior towards Judas fully put Judas’ actions right back into his lap. …………………..Further down the road in this story, Judas was alone. He had betrayed His Lord. He hated himself for what he’d done. He was going to take his life. He could not sit there and comfort himself with the thought, “He deserved it. He treated me this way and He treated me that way! Jesus got what was coming to Him……..” But, instead, Judas was faced with, “Even though Jesus knew what I was doing, He still loved me………He was still kind to me…..He still did things for me….” The whole weight was put on Judas. Jesus’ treatment of him changed everything…………..Jesus never had to wonder, “Maybe if I had done this or that, Judas wouldn’t have betrayed Me………….”
Looking back, I failed miserably in this arena. But, it is not too late for you and your children. Take an honest, hard look at yourself………..Is your bitterness and disappointment poisoning your daily living? Like Judas, does your child know that they are making wrong choices, yet see and feel your unconditional love towards them? Are you able to separate their behavior from who you are in Christ? You see, that is what Jesus was able to do. No matter what anyone said or did, He was able to know who He was and what His mission was and stay on course. I know how hard it is when they are fighting you every inch of the way, every single day…………..but I want to encourage you, I must encourage you……to think of your challenging child……. as Judas!!! Treat them as Jesus treated Judas…….wherever you can, whenever you can……
Maybe......just maybe....one day our child will be able to look back and see how much they were loved. Maybe they will feel the remorse and change their ways. Maybe, if we can clearly show them love, it will make a difference in their lives..........instead of them being angry and bitter, thinking we deserved their hate and anger.
Stay close to the Lord. Stay in His Word. Stay in prayer. Ask God and He will give generously. God Bless………
