wipers

By Kathryn Taylor

With RAD children in our home, parenting requires us to go where no normal parents have gone before. Only those who share our like fate could even come close to appreciating the story I'm about to tell. Those of you blessed with only average children will probably question the sanity of this entire family.

Many RAD children have bathroom issues. Our two are not to be excluded. There was a mysterious happening going on in our home. Poop was being wiped on towels hanging in the bathroom every other day or two. Of course, there were no confessions. A week or two passed and still we were no closer to finding out which of the two it was.

One day, I was baking a cake and one of my children suggested we put some of the delicious chocolate icing on a bathroom towel. In a moment of mischievous weakness, I conceded to the dastardly plot. It did not take long for one of my RADs to find the dirty towel and race out to show me what she'd found. Kicking into my normal response tone at finding such nasties, I asked, "Did you do this???!!"

"No!!" she says in her most honest voice (which she uses when she lies as well). I then accuse the other RAD. He duplicates his sister's denial. By this time, all the children have come to see what the latest crisis is. I wag the towel at everyone, asking each one, "Did you do this? Did you do this? Somebody better fess up! This has got to stop!!"

Each child disgustedly backed up with faces contorted. Each one, including my straight-faced cohort, boldly denied any knowledge of the new towel wiping. I rant for another moment or two, I stop, look at the towel, raise it close to my nose and smell it. I got a strange look on my face. "I'm sick of this!!" I declare,"if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!", I add.

I take the towel and pop the "poopy" part into my mouth, moaning and groaning over how delicious it is. Instantly, my four unsuspecting children, horrified by what I have just done, begin gagging and expressing their disgust to my insane action. My cohort child by this time is rolling on the floor laughing. I dance around the room with the towel as my flag, shouting cries of victory. Somehow, we manage to let everyone in on the dupe, or poop should I say, and soon all are laughing. The bathroom wiper retired that day, whomever it was.

......a little bathroom advice from Bella about struggling girls starting their period.......

...........I have a 13 year old girl RAD, and you are NOT alone in your menstrual story! I laughed when I read it. Mine leaves hers open, bloody, all over the floors, as if to say, "LOOK WORLD! I'm a woman now!" But its more like this - she will do the opposite of what you ask, so ask in a way that she won't fight your words. Say, "You have 2 choices concerning your pads. I don't care which one you do. You can either have me in the bathroom with you during your cycle, to ensure that you don't flush a pad again, and to remind you to wrap it in cut up newspaper OR you can get a big ziplock bag to put them in it. You can carry that bag back & forth with you from the bathroom back to your bedroom. But it stays in your bedroom. No more messes! (she will control them this way- and putting them in a garbage may be too much right now) She will pick the last one, well, because no way..... she wants you in the toilet with her! LOL!...... She may be 12/13 years old, but emotionally I am SURE she is MUCH MUCH younger than that. I do not treat my 13 year old like a 13 year old. I treat her like a 5 or 6 yr old, because that's how she views herself inside. She is regressed & hasn't grown past a certain age. When she does, I move up the way I treat her. I do not expect her, at an emotional age of 5 or 6, to be able to handle blood & menstrual stuff. .................. You are probably expecting WAY too much from her because she is pretty much fully grown in body now. But she is NOT fully grown. Treat her younger. You'll be happily suprised at how she'll "gentle up" some......

em-Bella-ishments

em~Bella~ishment: on birth control

......"I would tell you to put her on the pill ASAP-except that the estrogen in it closes her growth plates & she will stop getting taller. I brought my 13 yo to the OBGYN to get the pill. We will go back next year when she is fully grown (height).

You will soon have a grandchild if she doesn't stay by your side. Its only a matter of some sleazy boy who doesn't care about her age- taking advantage of what she's offering. Protect her from the consequences that she has NO IDEA about. Keep her by your side. ~Bella~

em~Bella~ishment about boys urinating in inappropriate places:

First:

DO NOT GET MAD.

That is his intention, to anger & gross you out.

SECOND:

Just look at it and say "Well, if you wanted to do the laundry, why didn't you just say so?!"

THIRD:

5 and a half is NOT too young to be doing his laundry if he is defiantly urinating on things. My son has been doing laundry since about the same age. 1rst grade, actually. I don't make him do all the laundry, just the stuff he on purpose makes wet.

FOURTH:

Same with when he urinates on his bed or on the wall or in the bathroom on the wall. (I am almost positive your son is doing the same) I walk in. I can smell it. I DO NOT LOOK FOR IT, NOR DO I GET ANGRY. I just say "Fix it" and turn around and walk away. He knows what he did and where he did it.

FIFTH:

Yes, this young, they need some tutoring with the wash, but let them do it. You do not want them to use the whole box of soap (and they will)

SIXTH:

Why does he do this? There are a number of reasons for urination. Children will urinate on walls because they feel too controlled. Children with anger issues use it to vent their anger. Children also use urine & feces as a tell tale sign of sexual abuse. It doesn't really matter why. Just treat is like any other spilled toy. Its a mess. Clean it up. Soon he'll turn his attention to spitting on his walls or flicking boogers on his ceiling! haha! Lovely! :)

Be Blessed!

~Bella~